Gym

Speaking of self-confidence, I paid for a gym membership yesterday. I’ve done this before, maybe eight or nine times over the past many years. I never quite get my money’s worth. Sometimes I’ll even pay months and months of fees just for the knowledge that I potentially could go the gym. This is king of like how my bike purchase has turned out.

And I even have a decent free gym at work. But it’s completely unrealistic to expect that, after 20 years of not being a morning person, I suddenly will become one. It’s not open late. It’s not open on weekends. And I’m still at work. So I’ve paid for a gym membership. I shall go. I shall go and stay for more than 20 minutes. And I shall not use going to the gym as an excuse to eat Randy’s Pizza twice a week.

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Range

I bought a range. I was just thinking, I should buy a range. Went to homedepot.com. Click. Click. Done. No returns.

Well, it didn’t exactly go down like that. I’ve wanted a new range ever since I moved in here, since the crusty, old one has been, well, crusty and old. It doesn’t self-clean. I myself don’t clean. The heating elements keep breaking, miraculously healing themselves, but then taking forever to get going, nonetheless. I suppose the crusty, old range is a metaphor, and, thus, it needs to go.

Yeah, but you don’t cook.

Point taken.

I also bought a bike, and I don’t exercise.

And, over the summer (Things I Did On My Summer Vacation #?), I bought a NOOK, and I don’t read.

And, maybe, someday, I’ll do more than just aspire to read more, exercise more, and cook more.

As for the range, I did go a little overboard. Do I really need five burners? Well, hell, yeah, if I’m going to throw that big party and cook for 20 people like I’m always talking about doing.

When have you been talking about doing that?

Well, never.